Family business coaching

The Legacy - The Steep Price of Unresolved Family Conflicts

LinkedinInstagramFacebookTwitter
August 22, 2023
  •  
4 minn read
  •  
René Sonneveld

Talk with Rene in a

Virtual coffe with Rene
Virtual Coffee

“Legacy is not what I did for myself. It's what I'm doing for the next generation.”-Vitor Belfort

In a mansion that overlooked a sprawling estate, two sisters, Joan and Veronica, once stood united with the shared responsibility of their father's legacy. Their father, a business magnate, had built an empire from scratch. His wish was for his daughters to safeguard their shared inheritance and ensure the family's wealth remained intact for the next generations.

Joan, the sister with business acumen, was a forward-thinking individual who believed in expanding their investments and had a penchant for embracing new-age startups as the key to future success. On the other hand, Veronica took a conservative approach. She believed in preserving the family's business ventures that had initially brought them prosperity. She advocated for maintaining their existing assets and enterprises as a way to honor their father's legacy.

At first, the sisters frequently convened meetings in their father's study to find common ground. However, over time their contrasting viewpoints began to overshadow their respect. Every discussion about investments would quickly veer off course and transform into arguments. Joan perceived Veronica as being stuck in the past, while Veronica believed that Joan was jeopardizing their father's fortune through her business ventures.

The bitterness didn't stop with the sisters. As family gatherings turned into battlegrounds, other family members chose sides or, more often, decided to step away. Children grew up sensing the tension, and in-laws whispered about the ongoing feud. Sunday family lunches, once a cherished tradition, became a thing of the past.

Diane, the sisters' cousin, attempted to mediate. She viewed the family legacy as more than assets; it represented a bond that had kept the family united for generations. "This legacy is more than just money and properties; it's about our lineage, our shared memories, and the love our ancestors had for each other," she pleaded. However, her words were ignored as the sisters' egos and unresolved resentments overshadowed reason.

It was during a particularly heated argument that Diane intervened with a suggestion. "What if we seek guidance from a family business coach?" she proposed. The idea wasn't immediately accepted, but the seed was planted.

After reflecting on it for weeks, the sisters, initially hesitant, decided to give it a try. They enlisted the service of a renowned family business coach known for navigating complex family dynamics. He commenced his work by conducting interviews to gather information. During the follow-up group sessions, he encouraged each family member to express their thoughts and feelings in a judgment-free environment. These sessions allowed them to discuss their concerns, fears and hopes openly.

The sessions were a mix of challenging conversations, initially tense, with pent-up emotions and accusations. However, the coach's calm and unbiased approach gradually led the family to move from pointing fingers to understanding one another. This process played a role in rebuilding trust.

The journey wasn't easy, but it marked a beginning. Sometimes all it takes is starting over.

“Good communications are central to leadership, conflict resolution, business success, family, and all your relationships' potential.” - Bryant H. McGill

The breakthrough came during a retreat organized by the coach. Away from their home and the shadow of their father's legacy, Joan and Veronica reconnected as sisters. They reminisced about their childhood, recalling dreams they had together and adventures they embarked on side by side. Amidst the mountains and open skies, they realized they had a shared vision for the family's future.

The family began implementing a more transparent decision-making process with the coach's guidance. They thought out experts to develop a governance structure while ensuring clear communication channels were in place. Regular consultations with family members gave them a sense of involvement, making sure that decisions were made in the business's best interest.

The coach also emphasized the importance of regular family meetings, which provide a platform for expressing and resolving concerns. Joan's innovative strategies and Veronica's risk-averse tactics started benefiting the family business.

“Family is not an important thing. It's everything.” – Michael J. Fox

Over time, the trust was restored. The family once again looked forward to gatherings, and the children grew up understanding the importance of communication and compromise.

While the legacy of wealth was significant, the sisters learned that the true inheritance lay in their bond and the values they passed down through generations. With the help of an external perspective, they were reminded that sometimes, when it comes to preserving a legacy, investing from the heart yields the highest returns. They decided to rebuild, not just for themselves but for the generations to come.

The family legacy lives on not in their estate or bank accounts but in the lessons of unity, understanding, and strong family connections.

I would love to know your opinion on this topic.

Thank you! Your submission has been received!
Oops! Something went wrong while submitting the form.